Cigna: "Next donkey. Line up for inspection. That's a good donkey."

See all the other happy donkeys?

From Insurance News (dot) Net, an insurance industry trade site:

New ''Wellness Score'' from CIGNA Can Forecast Health Risks Years in Advance

BLOOMFIELD, Conn.--(BUSINESS WIRE)--April 8, 2008--What if you could see into the future and know more now about the things you’re doing – or not doing – that are likely to result in health risks and health care expenses down the road? CIGNA is giving its members the ability to do just that by launching its sophisticated, “next generation” health assessment and predictive capabilities.

It goes on to describe how vast majorities of people surveyed thought it would be beneficial to have in-depth assessments done online. They said they would follow online "coaching" programs to improve their future health outlook. Sounds fairly positive and benign so far. After all, I trust Cignachokegasp.

...

Well I ain't. I'm anything but well. I'm trying my best not to vomit. It's the same happy imagery, happy people, as in the bank ads, the supermarket ads, whatever ads, all anonymously exuding in discommodious sync that "this advertiser's product makes me feel happy and safe."

Yeah. I could get cynical with it and suggest a devious secret plan to have customers (individual customers, not companies) visit the "My health and Wellness Center" site, and become a datum to be incessantly risk-analyzed against other data. Insurers and employers can get together and eliminate these kinds of risks. Cut costs. Save money in the long term. A too-sick person doesn't do an insurer or an employer any good in the long term.

This is the first few seconds of their online video (not embeddable):

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That's the very start of the video. Needless to say I was pretty shocked. I mean... damn. What exactly are they saying here? A few seconds in you see it was just a clever twist... what they mean is that they will anticipate future health problems with this system and help people be healthy and happy and avoid future problems and... they provide coaches that are there for you to assist and keep you healthy and happy and not missing work and -

I didn't see the above little semi-transparent gem until the third or forth time I watched the video. It wasn't there very long. Looks like most customers don't actually, you know... "get" the coaching part of the deal, just the spying part.

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So following the above stark, white on black message it went immediately to a cooler, more inviting color scheme, cue electro-meditation music, then friendly, inspiring messages, sans serif fonts ... more imagery of happy Cigna'd blissing smiling trusting folks throughout, and the following voice over:

There's probably nothing more important to you than your health. Good health provides us with the vitality we need to enjoy the best life has to offer. Yet, most of us don't really understand our health as best we could.

Um... sounds kind of, I don't know. Just... just keep your snooping risk analysis out of my vitality please? Okay?

Come now. Off with the foil hats. They aren't SPYING on me! What would they have to gain by knowing more detail about my life and health history? Indeed.

Spying Eyes
Who's watching while you surf, and what do they know about you? You might be surprised.

Browsing discussion groups on the Internet, a woman we'll call Betty found a conversation about how medical professionals treat patients. Betty joined in, complaining about her insurance plan and doctor. The next day, she got an e-mail from her HMO, asking her to discuss why she was unhappy.

Her HMO, it turns out, scans discussion groups for all mentions of itself and responds to comments.

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"She was surprised that she wasn't anonymous," says Karen Coyle, western regional director of Computer Professionals for Social Responsibility, who spoke to Betty after the incident.

Ha! Trolling discussion groups. This article is from 1998. It took them 10 years to train me to sit obediently at my assigned workstation and key all the info in myself. Soon they won't have to spy on me at all.

Quick, cue happy people imagery, I think I'm losing them...

The new analytics also have benefits for CIGNA's employer customers. By understanding the overall health status of its entire employee base, an employer can tailor individual and population-based health and wellness programs to address those risks. ... The ultimate goal is a healthier and more productive employee population, which will result in lower medical, disability and lost-time costs.

“Health assessments are powerful tools that enable an employer to assess the health status of its workforce while also helping employees become more actively engaged in their own health and wellness,” said Andrew Scibelli, manager, employee health & well-being, Florida Power & Light Company.

(snip)

“The secret is in knowing which risks are critical to address in order to reduce the number of dangerous risk combinations, and the Trend Management Systems allows us to identify those key risks,” said CIGNA's Dixon.

Whoa. I share my private medical information with doctors, nurses, any clinician. With my insurance company - I don't like it, but okay - with my insurance company.

With my employer? All of my personal, private medical information is to be shared with my boss now? When exactly did I become their donkey again? After they get a complete file on my health and vitality, will they squeeze my balls and look between my teeth? Am I so much indentured property?

And what if there is some indication of an expensive (read: bad) medical problem in my distant future, Cigna? What do you really mean by asking my employer this question:

If you knew which of your employees was going to have a major costly illness in the next 2 years, would you do anything different?

Is it really an online questionnaire and some diet/exercise info that is going to save me two years from now? Are you really just looking out for my future and keeping me healthy? Is that really what this program is all about?

Nice donkey. [Quick, cue happy people!]

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That's not what this program is about at all, is it.

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[Cross-posted at dkos]