Filmmakers from Canada’s No-Job Capitol Re-brand Panhandling

Bumped and promoted. Originally posted 2009-03-16 17:59:47 -0500. -- GH

VAHALLA, NY.  Recently, there has been a stream of people quoting Ayn Rand and her novel, Atlas Shrugged as justification for the economic policies that created the current financial crisis. Ms. Rand's polemic novel which assaulted altruism and government has been quoted and promoted by CEO's, government officials, lobbyists as well as print, radio and television - and apparently, they've all got it wrong.

The source of this claim?  None other than the ghost of Ayn Rand herself, who recently appeared near her tombstone in Kensico Cemetery.  According to several witnesses, the image of Ms. Rand first appeared several weeks ago.  Initial observers assumed that the spirit was simply another CEO come to Ms. Rand's tombstone to meditate and give herself permission to lie, cheat and steal in the name of some Libertarian higher moral code.

Promoted. -- GH

"The only good union is a dead union!" Osama bin Laden stated in prepared remarks today.

DATELINE MUSCAT, OMAN: Another shocking revelation of anti-Union plotting and scheming today, but this time it was not CEO's of TARP Bailout recipient banks. 
The attendees?  Senior Al Qaeda management, including Osama bin Laden,
Ayman al-Zawahiri and over two dozen more senior managers.  It marked a
historic first time for so many senior managers from Al Qaeda to be in
one place at the same time. Under normal circumstances and for security
reasons, Al Qaeda leaders are not allowed within 50 miles of each other
but desperate times call for desperate measures.

Set in the sleepy seaside town of Old Muscat, a city that has seen
better days.  Over the centuries, Muscat has served as a seat of
government and a door way to trade between Asia, Africa and Eastern
Europe.  The walls of the old city look out over the bay like bleached
bones, preserved in the salt and dry air.  The people that remain here,
do so stubbornly, like the wild trees and bushes that eke out their
existence along the rocky shoreline, sandwiched between ocean and
desert, buffeted by wind and heat.  The old market is still here, but
only locals trade there.  Dubai, with its glimmering towers and huge,
modern port facilities has rendered Muscat into merely a side trip for
the curious.  The Al Qaeda leadership meeting here, would very much
like to avoid becoming another Muscat.