rgillis's blog

Moon's leaders declare war on Earth after attack by NASA

Reprinted with permission; original post here. -- GH


by Robert Gillis, who really has too much time on his hands.

10/2009


Lunar officials declared war on Earth early Friday morning after NASA launched a preemptive strike on Cabeus Crater, home to thousands of Moonies, Moonites, and Moon-Units.

CNN had reported that NASA engineers crashed a rocket and a satellite into the moon's surface on Friday morning in a $79 million mission, to supposedly "kick up enough dust to find whether there is any water in the moon's soil."

Movie Reviews are easier than you think!

by Robert Gillis
Published in the Foxboro Reporter and Boston City Paper 8/2009

Crossposted with permission from www.robertxgillis.com.


Although I rarely go the movies due to cost and my own profound laziness, I realized that I could be an ideal movie critic / reviewer / marketing spinner — because let’s face it, when writing a movie review or tagline, the facts, though interesting, are irrelevant. I mean, ANY movie, no matter how bad, can be manipulated via creative writing into a must-see film. Or a completely different film. And doing this is easier than you might imagine. So without further ado, here are some of my descriptions of movies, all with my special "must see" marketing spin.

Press on, newspapers!

The following piece is a reprint of Press On, Newspapers by Robert Gillis, reprinted with permission. It first appeared in the Foxboro Reporter and The Boston City Paper this May. -- GH

As this is a column about a newspaper, specifically the Boston Globe, allow me to begin with a clarification. I am not an employee of the Foxboro Reporter, never have been. I’m not on staff; I don’t attend their editorial meetings, and at times have even written opinions which were contrary to the Reporter’s own ideas on a subject. For 13 years I have been very grateful to Jeff, and now Bill, for allowing me the opportunity to FREELANCE for the paper and for the privilege of them allowing my words to occupy a space on page 5. It has been, and continues to be, a true honor, and I hope to continue our association for a very long time.

That said, there WAS a time I DID work for a major newspaper, but not in the capacity you might imagine. Back in 1980, right around this time of year, I started selling papers for the Boston Globe. I wasn’t a paperboy – I was actually in the city of Boston, peddling the Globe for 20 cents to passing cars.

The pay was good for a 15 year old back then -- $4.25 a day for two hours of after-school work, plus 6 and one half cents per paper sold.

Less than a week after I started, I got my permanent spot outside Woolworths Department store in Downtown Crossing – where I would stay for three years until I had outgrown the job and left at age 18.

The winters were absolutely brutal; as Leonard Nimoy once said about selling newspapers in a Boston Winter, “That will teach you character.”

I learned to dress in layers very fast.