Texas Humor - Investment Advice

This little ditty made me chuckle...but, of course, it makes sense. I am a rabid recycler...and the beer is consumed by my hubby! Hope this brightens your day just a little!

Investment advice:

I have done my research.

If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Delta Airlines one year ago, you will have $49 today.

If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in AIG one year ago, you will have $33 today.

If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Lehman Brothers one year ago,you will have $0 today.

But, if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the aluminum cans for a recycling refund, you will
have received $214.00.

Based on the above, the best current investment plan is to drink heavily & recycle. It is called the 401-Keg. A recent study found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that Americans drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year. That means that, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon!

Makes you proud to be an American!

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I can find you some expert investment advisers with a lot of experience in 401-Keg plans. They can give you great advice on how to dollar cost average your investment by purchasing 6 packs, 12 packs or a case.

in my 401 Keg for years...

I knew the experts would come crawling out from under the woodwork!

I think I like your gallons better than I like our litres.

Unless you plan to drive to the recycling drop off path. Otherwise you may have to factor in citations for drunk driving which can be such a spot of bother.



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